Creating cues of safety
Imagine being stranded in the water and you see someone throw a lifesaver; you’re going to feel some since of relief. That lifesaver is cue of safety, telling your brain ahh hope! I had a past student reach out to me recently and we started talking about feeling burned out in the field. I am seeing that happen earlier with new graduates. I think the pandemic has a lot to do with it but also just the field. It is a mess and many people are not ready or do not want to deal with it. One thing I recommended was to identify what it is exactly that is stressing you out. I had a supervisee recently say “my supervisor, just her”. Well narrow that down. What about her? Break that down and try to find some perspective. “The client’s are heavy to deal with and I just feel drained.” What about the clients, is it certain ones, age group, trauma, or a specific clinical topic? If you are feeling drained after a client, they are borrowing a lot of your nervous system during that session. And chances are you’re not purposely scheduling either. If you know you have more challenging cases don’t schedule them back to back, if you can. Or on some days you just want to get it done with, have a bouncing back plan after the day. You are either going to want to shut down, watch TV and not talk to anyone or you are going to want to go for a run or get some energy out.
As a therapist you want to make sure you “anchor in ventral” a term coined by Deb Dana and basically what that means is you want to try to stay optimally regulated in session. This is not going to happen all the time; and you often fluctuate in and out of fight, flight, and freeze mode. This happens especially when we are working with trauma narratives. I don’t think a lot of students and new therapists know this but our nervous systems are surrogates for our clients (Sue Johnson) in essence they borrow our nervous systems to co-regulate. We are also surrogate attachment figures in attachment work! Polyvagal theory shows support for these concepts as the emphasis is on embodied safety in the relationship.
Spending 5 minutes in nature- in person or virtual, it doesn’t matter, it will anchor you in ventral. Add elements on your desk or in your office that makes you feel safe. Pictures, miniatures, soft things, fidget things, whatever you need to see your nervous system subtle cues of safety. Do not underestimate the impact of this. Small things can lead to big changes.
